“The fact that he is British and shaven headed may be of some comfort to, say, the tonsorially elegant Antipodean, but frankly, does it matter?”

“I was just wondering why women should think that bald men were more intelligent than those of us not tonsorially challenged.”

“During my more tonsorially experimental phases, I noted with interest that the levels of attention I would get from in-store security staff depended on the colour of my hair.”